I'm looking forward yet not excited at all. CRAP!

COUNTDOWN: LESS THEN 24HOURS NOW.

heheh. really can't wait to be 18 but seriously i don't feel excited. i don't want the same old thing to repeat again. boring birthdays just go down the bin lah! i feel so sian for my birthday. like nothing is going to happen, nothing to make up for all my other hopeless birthdays. seriously don't wish that to happen this time round.

okay stop talking about birthday. anyway wed, met elleen, wanteng, jon and yun looong. had a fun day with them. catch up and all. waiting for elleen to upload the photos but she still haven. FASTER! =) then met alvin, sheryl, winston and nick to watch The Gamer and sit n sheryl's car. drove thru the mac drive thru. and slack around before heading home.

thurs & fri was working from 7am-7pm. went brandon yeo's birthday party. he damn skinny now i swear. HAHAHAH. his birthday is today!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAO DE! 1 MORE YEAR BEFORE 18!

sat: was a boring day. lucky sheryl ask me out. met her, nick, anson, yuen hui, jeremy and adrina for dinner. didn't eat cause i had mine already. then talk for a while before sheryl send me home. my voice cui only. okay off to bed. tmr celebrate with family! hope i can head down to town to do a little shopping. hope mummy will bring me. =)

BOYFRIEND I MISS YOU!

FASTER COME BACK! xD

Obsessed

I'm so irritated! i'm freaking having a blocked nose.

Anyway, suppose to have a movie marathon but boyfriend just left me in his living room while he play his game. idiot boy! hahaha. i stone infront of the tv until he finish can!

after that went to eat at fish & co express. First time there. Not bad at all. hahaha. then walked around. brough my yogurt before heading home. slept in the bus. damn tired!

Tmr meeting elleen, wan teng, jon and yun loong. i guess that's all. SO EXCITED TO MEET THEM! miss them many! haven seen them like for a long time. sigh. really miss alot of people. 4days not meeting boyfriend already is a torture. okay not really but really misses him. hehehe.

MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 6 MORE DAYS! OMG! I CAN'T WAIT!

even though i said that i don't feel excited about it. hope some unexpected things will happen this year. =)

okay off to eat my yogurt. GOODNIGHT!

Fated to love you.

SO ADDICTIVE! IT'S A MUST TO WATCH! =)

Anyway sorry for the lack of updates. don't have the urge to blog. have been sick since thurs. got better already expect for my thorat still sore. =( life's been boring. got nothing interesting coming up. but i can't wait till next week! i hope it will be FUN! save money now please,vanessa. okay im off to watch the show now. BYE!

OMG! I FREAKING WANT TO WATCH THIS MOVIE! 20TH NOVEMEBER FASTER COME!

HIGH!

GOODNESS MAN! DAMN FREAKING HIGH NOW!

was at vie bar drinking just now. drank one pitcher magarita with lime. after that was 2 jugs of volka with lime and canberry. finish up the lime one. gosh! was damn high and camwhoring like nobody's business. called boyfriend after that and talk to him all the way till home. seriously my brain was working on a slow mode. couldn't catch what he was saying most of the time. pictures up soon. cause it's bloody long to upload. that's what i hate about blogger. anyway im off to upload them in facebook. my connection got something wrong. idiot.

GOODNIGHT!

glad to know that.

On the verge to cry

I FUCKING GOT GPA OF 2.3!
fuck man i swear! fucking disappointed in myself.
i study quite hard for it and i get this.
maybe it's also my fault fo putting enough effort and chionging like the day before.
BUT STILL! URGH! hate myself man. WHY AM I SO STUPID!
sometimes i wonder if i choose the correct course.
OH WHATEVER!

First month

Saturday: work work work. start work at 4pm till 10pm. working alone is boring but lucky time passes quite fast for me. thank god! after that meet laopo to go home but head mac first. AND we miss our last train by 1 mintue. stupid. so went to see what bus i can go home. took 14 and stop at bedok south secondary school there and walk hom. scary man the road. plus had a nightmare not too long ago. which has ..... shall not say it. reach home msg laopo. stupid me don't know how to call my father come fetch me. ass can save all the transport fee. oh well, never mind. talk to laopo for like 3 hours. it's been ages since we last talk like this.

Sunday: slept like till 4pm. met the usual at tampines inter before taking 81 and change another bus to chomp chomp. moody that day i guess. not my usual hyper self which is super werid. so ate and slack around. then cab home cause was late. owe sheryl money!

Monday: met wan teng and jon today! first went to meet wan teng. then we walk around while she tells me things. woah! it's alot man. hahaha. so after that settled at HK cafe had dinner and our chit chats. feel so much better talking to them. and listening to thier stuffs. should have more of these in the future. hahahaha. when to find a card at ink. swear i took bloody long to choose one. hahaha. im so indecisive. finally settled on this black card and they even give me an idea. walk to mac and talk some more! they had ice cream while i had coke. play tag tag. can just play them everyday!

I WANT AN ITOUCH!

train home after that and talk to boyfriend on the phone. he's sick! poor things. eat some more fried food lah! haiyo.

TUESDAY - 8/9/09

HAPPY FIRST MONTH LOVE! meet wan teng today to print the picture out. don't like the feeling of going lucky plaza. after that went to the mac to had our lunch and pasta my stuffs. so walk to far east to shop around while waiting for jon, ryna and boyfriend to come. show them the sandal i want! damn pretty! i confirm getting them. settled at the wanton noodles shop there while jon have his lunch. talk and plan what to do next since wan teng going off work at 4pm. catch THE PROPOSAL! damn funny man the show. and some i don't get it have to ask boyfriend. while jon and ryna catch I Love You Beth Cooper. they said so so for the movie. met up for dinner with them. had chicken rice. just one day and i break my "no rice". DAMN IT. after that F21 and ion and home. i swear boyfriend is damn dense. i trying so hard to tell him got a card but he stll don't get it. until i practically just shift it to him then he realise. idiot man. make me shy only! LOL. seriously i don't know what will happen in the future but for now let's just stay this way. love you.

okay im off to sleep have work tmr. working sucks! why am i not rich?

Go away!

PHOTOS UP! DIDN'T UPLOAD ALL BECAUSE THERE ARE LIKE 197 PICTURES WE TOOK ON THAT DAY. IT'S ALL ON FB.

THIS WEEK!

MONDAY: met boyfriend and we went to alot of places. dinner at tampines with sheryl, anson, nick, huiling and yuen hui.

TUESDAY: suppose to catch UP movie but failed cause got job interview. meeting time was at tampines at 10am. end up all woke up late. so meet alvin and nick first. but after that also not going down already. so went to nick house. was damn TIRED on that day. really can die lah. so slept at nick's house while alvin played his game and nick sleeping on his bed. feel damn good after the nap! so slack until about 5plus head to ehub. waited for sheryl and winston to catch District 9 movie. GOSH! that movie is damn ...... i swear! and also kinda boring. home i went after that.

WEDNESDAY: met the girls excluding char. she has attachment and after that out with lloyd. so we went to cut LONG BANGS. but mine is shorter then elena's one. after that felt super concious where ever i went. so parkway next. had my koi milk tea. NICE! then walk around and i buy lots of things. 2 shirts that i want to cut, 1 black tank, 1sandal and facial stuffs. SINFUL SHOPPING! home after that. felt damn shit cause of my bangs. and simpang at night.

THURSDAY: OUT WITH MY LAOPO & LAOGONG. though that day i feel a little down still. no mood to shop and all. but see the pretty sandals there. OMG! i freaking feel like getting them all. so anyway caught up abit. really miss them alot. cut my fringe shorter. so now it's really BANG BANGS! gosh! i really can't wait for it to grow. went home like 12am and talk to boyfriend till 4am and his phone died on him also. HAHAHA.

FRIDAY: woke up late and msg boyfriend. then he told me tonight chomp chomp dinner cancelled so we can catch the night movie instead. so i replied "okay then im going back sleep now" and her replied me "okay. you piggy". yeah i know i sleep alot. hahaha. so after that woke up and went for the job briefing. got it! hahaha. but sadly laopo can late so she didn't get it but she ask them for other jobs. so pray hard she can get one asap. then movie. FINALLY WATCH UP! freaking hell funny! laugh all my way and some parts are sad also. after movie ate then home. still can't stand my bangs. oh well at least i tried something new. it's a good deal anyway. okay shall sleep NOW! GOODNIGHT PEOPLE!

why this sudden feeling?

i hate it so much that i want it to go away.

but really im scared.

first time things are right for me,

first time i feel this way,

first time i want it so badly that im falling so deep.

first time im so scared to lose it.

so when i really do, what will become of me?

gosh im just thinking too much but these feelings. i can't help but feel this way.